i am sitting at the coffee bean of Resort Hotel now.. enjoying my fav. latte & the weather is really misty n cool now.. the perfect weather to enjoy a hot beverage, surf net & listening to music now..
its really relaxing at the moment now... how i wish i can stay here for a wk or so.... i haven felt so relaxed & so myself for ever since i started work..... its jus like i have gone back to the time when i used to come here almost quarterly with my mum... ever since i started work, this is like the 1st time i come here with her.. the past few times when i come, i come with my frenz & bf.... really reminds me of the time when i am so young & innocent.. the time when i dun really care about alot of things n think so much....
i really miss the 'ME' in the past.. i am slowly losing myself... this trip seems to let me found some 'parts' back... i seems to have a clearer goal now, know more of wat i wanted & i really wish to strive hard for it.... i dun feel like thinking so much of the consequences of the things i do now.. i jus wan to be like how i used to be, once i set myself upon a goal or sth, i will try my best to get it & dun care about how others think or feel.. think i have been worrying about this issue too much until i felt really unhappy & xin ku... seriously, i cant please everyone... i really tried hard to do that but in the end, things doesnt seems the way i wan it to be & in addition, i am not happy.......
is being happy such a difficult thing in life? why ppl jus has to distort ur kind intention for em? why ppl jus has to step over u when u make urself seems so nice to em & being nice to em? is the world such an ugly place? do we have to put on a tough n fierce front & be nasty b4 ppl wont step over the line & 'eat' u?
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