i have been thking wat title should i put for this blog entry and could not decide on a precise one.. its been a long time since i updated my blog and there are so many things which i wan to talk about but the most impt thing i wanna update is more about wat i am feeling rather den wat is happening..


i haven been speaking my mind n blog about my most inner tots on this blog for a really long time.. there was a period in the past which i had this experience b4, but for that time its mostly because i dun wan wat i blog here to affect someone.. as for this time round, there are alot more factors which i wanna factored in.. its not only target at a certain person but rather a few of em....


the nature of this blog has changed.. it used to be a place where i can vent out my emotions and voice out my inner most tots so that i will feel much better.. but now, i jus cant seem to be voicing out my tots as freely as how i used to in the past.. isit because of the world i am in now or isit because this is also part n parcel of growing up? there are alot more factors to thk about when u wan to speak ur mind.... its because of this issue, i seem to be bottling up alot of stuffs this days.. i lost the touch of speaking my mind and if i really wan to do so, i need alot more courage n time to process wat i wan to say out.. most of the time, i jus end up saying 'orh ok'..


was reading thru my blog b4 i start my work.. i really miss the time i spent at home with my mum.. just nuaing on my sofa, playing my PSP all day long, if not just lie there watching dvds with my mum.. i miss the time when we can go genting as n when we wan.. we can like mention about going today n jus go n book the room tml.. i miss the overnight MJ session at alvin's place, i miss the weekday window shopping session in town with my frenz, i miss going to JB in the afternoon with my mum jus to have our lunch & haircut there... all-in-all, i miss my FREEDOM...


really wish to have a resort vacation soon.. jus wanna lie on the beach with a nice cocktail beside me... its been a long time since i go suntanning.. need to get some color back to my skin..


but b4 i can fulfil that wish of mine, i will be going to KL for this Chi New Yr once again.. New Yr always seems to be a very boring occassion for me, this yr its no exception again.... but luckily this yr it doesnt fall on or near my b'day, if not i will be even more SIANZ... i can still rem there was a yr when it falls exactly on the same day.... its total bullshit la, having to put on a false front n fake a smile on a SUPER special day of mine...


well, at least this yr, i will be glad that i can have 4 day straight off and can slp all i wan there.. hehe... super looking forward to the amount of rest which i can get during the new yr period in KL... hehe... well, this is to prepare myself for the different 'tua' of gambling sessions which will be waiting for me when i come back from KL.. wahaha... I miss MJ-ing~~~~

summary of the month..

its been almost a mth since i last updated my blog.. alot of things had happened over the past mth.. i get to meet up quite a few of my frenz whom i haven seen for ages during the festive season, i got to attend parties which i had never attended b4 in e past, i went to places where i had never explored in my life in singapore b4.. all-in-all, the past mth seemed to be a fulfilling mth for me..


but one thing is, i have been showing too much emotions already.. emotions which i shouldnt have shown in e first place.. argh~~


roadshow is coming to an end soon, gonna go back to the dealing room for my OJT already.. last week, the new batch just came in, seeing them reminds me of my first mth in the company.. time really flies, i had been working for 3 mths already.. i really love the culture in my company, mayb more specifically, the culture of my team... we will hang out for dinner, drks or chilling session after work or even during weekend.. :)

off day~~

after 7 days of consecutive working & standing, its my OFF day~~

woke up ard 11 plus cause i am meeting a fren in town for lunch.. walked ard in Orchard & it was damn crowded.. i hate to go to town during weekend because of the crowd & this is worse when its near the X'mas season.. everyone is like rushing there to get presents or clothes for their X'mas party..

had my lunch at Waraku, one of my fav. japanese restaurant.. it was really filling.. after that, we went to Borders.. its been a long long time since i last went there & as usual, alot of things have changed...

i went to Suntec to wait for dinner cause we will be meeting for dinner with Arthur.. went to the chicken rice store at selegie, was too full to have my fav. tou huay after the meal.. we din have any plans when we got onto Daron's car.. only decided to go to Keppy By the Bay after wondering about for a while..

its my first time there & i only knew about the place not long ago.. its really windy & quite crowded when we reached the place.. its a really cool place for chilling out.. its a pity that i dun know about this place until now.. but its ok, i will try to go there more often.. :)

we were given a seat near the bridge & ordered a bottle of wine, chosen by our wine expert

-- > Arthur..

really love how the wind blows, how the wine taste & how the sky looks like when we were chilling there.. it was really relaxing & i totally love this kinda feeling.. it would be better if i have my jacket with me cause it was getting abit chilly as the night gets 'older'

..

Daron sent us back home after that.. must thx him for sending us back home & bringing us to such a nice chillout place.. :)

1st christmas party~~

i went for my 1st x'mas party this year @ brewerk kallang.. it was a party organised by billy's company & i was invited by his manager to join em.. it was really unexpected but i am glad & really appreciate their kind gesture towards me.. most imptly, the party turned out to be really great.. nice food, great company, fantastic atmosphere & ambience at the place.. it was my first time going there for dinner & i hope to go there more often cause i really thk its a nice chillout place, esp by the river...

i mus say i have been eating alot this past few days & yest was no exceptions.. after dinner, we played some games & started mixing red wine with beer.. this was a real issue esp when we drk really very fast..

den it comes the gift exchange part, i wasnt told about the gift exchange thingy so i din prepare anything at all.. maybe its because its compulsory for their team & not for the guest invited ba.. but i got a t-shirt from em during the session.. its really nice of em to prepare a gift for me....

after the whole thing ended ard 12 plus, me & billy decide to go geylang & look ard.. tell u guys a secret, its the first time i went there in e middle of the night with some hidden agenda other than for the food... ( guess wat's the hidden agenda ) hehe... it was really an eye-opener for me..

after that, we went mount faber for a chillout session.. i jus enjoy going there to chill.. it jus gives me a different feeling when i was up there.. yest was a bonus cause it was really windy & chilly.. at some pt i tot i was @ genting because of the weather..

had a really nice chat with billy.. as usual, i am the one doing most of the talking.. haha.. felt so pai sei towards him cause he had to listen to all my shit.. must thx him for being such a gd listening ear & sending me home after tat even though his place is like only a 10 min drive away from mount faber.. :)

haoran's birthday~~

had been working for 6 consecutive days le.. feeling abit tired but luckily i din go drk lo.. cause i thk it really makes a diff.. i am getting tired of dancing n such already, chilling and drking still sounds attractive to me though.. hehe.. in fact, i am totally in love with red wine now... gonna go to some wine distributor place with arthur soon.. he is a fan of red wine also.. can ask him to teach me some stuffs about red wine..


just came back from a steamboat session with my team ppl, sebas and daron.. it was haoran's 30th birthday... we went to chinatown after our roadshow.. it was about 10 when we reached there & i am pratically starving already.. the place serve really nice "ma la" steamboat but it was too spicy for me le.. their handmade noodles and dumplings was simply fantastic.. i am missing it already.. :)

a different experience~~

i better upload my pics n blog about my KL trip b4 i forget about it.. this is just part of the post cause i haven really got the time to upload all the photos onto my comp yet.. been really busy with work and going out late at night with my frenz this days... can see that my dark eye circle is turning from bad to WORSE.... shit... thk i should save up for plastic surgery already....


i went to KL & genting about 2 wks back again.. this is the 2nd time in a mth, its amazing isnt it? well, this time round, we went to KL also.. we went to wayne's sister place for MJ b4 heading down to the airport to take our flight at 6.30am.. the flight took about 45 min and before we know it, we already touched down at the KL airport...

we took a taxi down to the central of KL but it was too early for us to check in.. so we went to the coffeebean nearby to slack and wait for news of our hotel room.. luckily we managed to get a room at hotel imperial, the usual hotel which i stayed there with my parents during chinese new yr.. after resting n bathing, we went on with our shopping spree at Sungei Wang, Times Square n Pavillion...

we went to have our dinner at the seafood restaurant near our hotel b4 going to change for our nights out.. we went to this place call Luna Bar which is really near to the KL tower... the place was superb and really blow me off totally.. i love the ambience and the night scenery there... i was totally mesmerised by it and it was really overwhelming...

we went to zouk after that & i was quite disappointed actually.. it wasnt as happening as the on in singapore.. the dancefloor was quite small as compared to the one here & there is some renovation work going on @ their velvet which means we have one less place to explore.. but the company was really gd, even though the music wasnt really wat i like but i do enjoyed myself alot because of the company with me.. they are really fun to be with & i enjoy every moment with em.. :)

4th Dec, Thur :

we took a cab up to Genting.. the weather was really cooling.. after checking in, we went to have our meals & met my mum who was there with my siblings also.. hehe..

we went to catch a movie after having a coffee session at Old Town Cafe.. we managed to catch 2 movies there, Bolt & Beast Stalker.. well, i prefer the first one MORE.. in between the movies we had 2 hours break so we went to my favourite hangout place, the coffeebean @ Resort hotel.. love the ambience there esp at this time of the year....

after the movie, we were all super tired.. but we still had a special programme in line -- celebrating WAYNE'S BIRTHDAY.. we had bought the cake b4 hand n the only thing we need to do is to delay him from going up to the room cause we need to prepare the setting.. we did managed to stall him..

we drank the wine which we had bought at the airport b4 we fly over but b4 that we had a hard time trying to open the wine.. i now believe that red wine can make u slp better cause after drking the bottle, everyone went to bed soundly.. its been a long time since i last felt so relaxed b4 i slp... really love that kinda feeling....

happiness is simple...

its been a long time since i last felt so happy.... i nearly forgot how it felt to be really happy from the bottom of my heart... the feeling of happiness from deep inside rather than being a surface thingy... i guess b4 today, all the smiles that was shown on my face might be just a pretence... wow, wat a statement right? if that is really the case den i am just a superficious person rite?? put it nicely, i am a very accomodating person... haha.. cause i can accomodate to the situation n behave differently and correctly in different scenario...





for the past mths, i had been trying to find the happiness feelings.. i tot i would found it when i was out, with my frenz, when i was drking or watsoever.. i tot only when i am out or with alcohol den i will feel happy n relaxed.. well i was totally wrong.. my happiness is always right next to me... right in my house... they are my family... the happiness i am looking for is actually the simplest one can thk of... its because they are so simple, alot of ppl has missed out on em.. it might be because they dun believe that happiness cannot be attain n get hold of so easily..... but actually IT IS...

sick on the first day of my roadshow~~

i am seriously sick this time round.. i tot i will feel better after popping my panadol n having a gd rest on thur night but i was wrong.. yest when i was at the roadshow, i was practically shivering.. the coldness and backache is really killing me.. in e end, i had to go n see a doc and was sort of scolded by her for coming to work even though i know that i was sick the previous night.. my temperature was like 38.6 degrees and was given a 3 day MC.. she keep on telling me to rest at home n not to drk any alcohol in e next few days..


felt really bad cause i cant help my team n contribute to their sales target for the next 3 days.. i am also afraid that i will have a hard time catching up with em also.. but there is nth i can do now except to rest well n quickly recover.. when i reached home yest, my whole body is like falling apart.. after popping my antibiotics, panamol, throat inflammation pill and the lozenges, i jus fell aslp.. i am only awake for 15 min to have my dinner den i went to slp again.. i keep on switching places to slp.. from my bedroom to my living room n back to the bedroom again.. duno wat i was doing, wanted to catch the show when i was at the living room but once i hit the sofa, my eyes just shut themselves automatically and i fell aslp once again...

wonderful company~~

i just reached home not long ago from my genting trip with anna, yu perng and wayne.... its a really wonderful trip.. its my first time going overseas with anna darling so i am quite excited about the whole trip...

i met her straight after work on fri at bugis with rex and yu peng.. had my dinner with em at this jap-french restaurant on e 2nd level.. i really live the ambience n food there.. it will be one of the place where i will frequent in the future.. aft that, we went for dinner at the famous dessert store at liang seah street b4 heading down to golden mile to take our coach there... we waited until 1045 den the coach reached.. only managed to leave the place ard 1115, its damn late la.. can foresee us reaching genting after 530..

the coach ride was alrite, slp all the way... haha.. damn tired from work.. like wat we foresee, we only reached ard 545, wayne came to fetch us to the hotel room to put our bad and wash up b4 starting our day.. he was already there the previous night due to some happenings..

its been a long time since i stayed @ resort hotel.. i din know they had such a major makeover for the room.. it looks damn cosy n classy.. we decide to meet for breakfast @ 730 but the guys did not come!! they are too engrossed about the game n forget totally about our breakfast meeting.. we just had ours n went to walk ard the place aft that.. when we left that time, which is ard an hr later den they called us n tell us to wait for em..

we went to walk ard first world, the casino and finally met em at the circus place and acc em for breakfast.. the weather was really cooling and it seems like its gonna rain.. we chit-chatted over there b4 walking ard n check out the cable car place cause anna darling wanted to have a ride later.. we went back to the casino b4 checking out from resort & check-in at first world..

me & anna were quite pissed with the new room cause of the the running water.. so we had a change of room.. they gave us a new room at the corner with superb view but we did not stay long in e room also..

we went to take the cable car after having our lunch as requested by anna.. hehe.. at first i dun wan to go one but i went in e end cause its like things might only happened just once so when u have the chance to do it just go ahead... this might be the only time the 4 of us wil go on a vacation like this so i mus treasure everything we do together..

the ride was fun & the weather was superb.. we bought some food from the cable car terminal b4 going back to genting.. we leave the guys at the casino & went back to our hotel to put our stuffs b4 going for our ktv session.. we got this super large room with a super large projector screen.. it seems a little too much for us... haha.. its a 2 hour session that ended about 830.. we went to the arcade after that & tried out some machines.. it was damn funny..

after having our fun @ the arcade, we went to take a walk & went to the park near theme park hotel.. its not drizzling anymore and the night is really clear w/o mist.. we are able to see KL from there.. it was quite an experience also.. had a really nice chat with wayne, thk that was the first time we talk about so many things... we stayed there until 11 b4 heading to the coffeebean at resort hotel for some hot drks to warm us up... i had my favourite latte with the coffeebean cheesecake under the moonlight with the greatest company ever.. what more can i ask for?? hehe.. this is one of the best part of the trip also, we had some talk and it was really engaging..

the 3 of us, excluding wayne went back to the hotel after that cause anna need to take out her contacts.. we joined wayne an hour later at the casino.. he was really mobile & we always had a hard time looking for him in e casino..

anna went back to the hotel to rest ard 3 plus.. as for me, i stayed on n acc perng.. we stayed there until 7 plus b4 anna reached & we went for breakfast together.. by the time i am already super tired.. that is also when the lamest side of me will show up, thk they really cant be bothered with me lo.. haha.. sometimes i cant even stand wat i said also, i just blurted everything that comes into my mind w/o thking at all...

we went for prata den went for dim sum.. haha.. amazed by how much we can eat rite..

perng went to the casino after that while e 3 of us went back to the hotel and packed our stuffs cause we wanted to go the the temple to bai bai.. we took the 11am bus down to the temple.. wa, it changed quite alot.. so different from the last time i went there which was like more den 5 yrs back... i really love the serenity the place gave me.. it was really relaxing and the view was superb.. mus thx wayne for bringing us there...

we took the 1215 bus back & went to find perng at the casino.. the guys continued their session there while me & anna darling went to have our lunch at my favourite place, Old Town Cafe... perng came to join us shortly & it was about to rain by then.. we met wayne at the bell counter at 2pm to collect our lugguage..

it was pouring by then & the terminal was flooded with ppl.. we finally got onto the bus and i was having a headache by then.. din really care about wat is happening & jus force myself to take a nap first... by the time i woke up, we are at the place to buy the local goodies... bought some stuffs and continued slping all the way until the 2nd pit stop.. haha... guess i am really tired, wat i did on the bus is slp n slp n slp... din really get to enjoy the movies, games provided...

the bus uncle was really nice & crappy.. haha.. was really amused by wat he said.. by 9 pm, we already reached singapore.. had our dinner at golden mile, the very same place where we sit with rex 2 nights back while waiting for our bus.. haiz....

everyone felt damn sian about coming back esp when we have to work the next day.. well, that's how everyone will feel whenever they come back from the vacation ba.. its like coming back to reality..

all-in-all, this is really an enjoyable trip with the greatest company ever.. it was fun, informative, everyone is comfortable with everyone, no quarrels or conflicts, we were all very accomodating to one another and i thk that is really very important cause during the trip, the most impt thing is to have fun & enjoyed it.. in this trip, it fits everything... i really enjoyed everything i did during the 2D1N trip.. wat could be improved is the duration, it could have been longer but due to the working schedule of each n everyone, its hard to accomodate and made it longer.. wonder when will the be the next nearest trip...

opps, i just came back from one about 2 hours back and i am now thking for the next one... haha..

do i understand myself??

sometimes i feel like i duno myself at all.. do i really dun understand myself or i just dun wan to go n face it?? working life is making me becoming more n more complicated.. there are so many contradictions... i am like getting more n more away from my wishes of being simple in life.. i want to trust in everyone that comes into my life but i know its impossible to do so in this world... i miss my sch life~~ it was much simpler back then lo..


why are those ppl who are sincere n truthful always at the losing end in this society?? why are they being taken n look upon as a fool for being sincere?? the wrong is not on them but on those ppl who are treating them like fools... ppl are getting wary n suspicious when someone treat them better, they will always think he/she has a motive for doing so... why cant they believe that they are doing so because they wanted to do it that way?? things are actually very simple but why are we making it becoming so complicated.....


how long do i have to live in this sickening society?? i am getting tired of this lo.. i hate to face this kinda shit and i dun thk i am cut out for it also.. is that why i am getting tired?? is becoming a part of the majority the only way out for me to survive in this world??

this was supposed to be my place where i can voice out everything but now i am being skeptical about talking here because of some reasons.... thk i just brought it upon myself lo.... its a first new lesson learnt.... guess there will be more to come.. i found a sentence said by my team leader to be really relevant in life.. dun keep banging ur head into the same wall... its a simple sentence but hard to carry out.....

happy halloween~

yest it was the first time i went out to club & chill on halloween night itself.. in e morning, we were having our papers.. seriously i din really study much cause of the time constraint, its just impossible to finish that whole pile of notes....

the paper took 1hour 45 min... b4 that, we saw declan & eugene.. they had come to tender their resignation... feeling quite sian when i know they are leaving.. i was quite close to em, in a sense tat we talked more den some of my other colleague.. really cant bear to see them leave.. i know the world is cruel & there are alot of things that are beyond our control... guess i have to adapt to this cruelty soon....

in e evening we had our sales assessment.. wait until i wan to slp le.. when i went into the room, my mind was blank, those things which i had forgotten everything i prepared earlier so have to thk about it on the spot.. by the time i finished it is already 8 pm le..

after that i met anna & we went to the riverside by the UOB building to chat while waiting for the others.. i never had a chance to look at the lovely night scene by the singapore river over there even though my office building is just a 2 min walk away...

we went for dinner with junxing, joel & ken.. donavan & sebastian came over to join us later.. after dinner we went to clarke quay.. its damn happening there.. u can see alot of ppl dressed up for the event & it was packed with ppl... its been months since i went to clarke quay.. it has always been my favourite chill out place.. i just like the lighting and feeling the whole place gives me... it feels soothing, relaxed and romantic.. isit because of some happenings there that relate me to the latter feeling? erm.. mayb it did contributes to some of it ba...

we wanted to go to pump room but it seems quite packed... we decide to go to double O n take a look & it seems worse there... turned back to clarke quay, went ard looking for the shortest queue & finally found a place to settle in.. Lunar.. never been there b4 but i find it to be quite alright... only managed to get a drk after 1130...

i can only say that we drank alot & mix alot.. it was really scary looking at how & the amount they drk la.. i can never ever drk like tat lo.. i dun wanna get drunk, high is enough already.. you wont be enjoying the night if u get drunk... they took alot of photos n videos.. shall take a look at them on mon...

we stayed there until 3 plus n went to take a cab home.. reached home ard 4 plus & chatted online with a fren until 6 sth... that explains why i just woke up an hour ago.. haha... just feel like lazing ard at home n not doing anything.. felt quite bad cause cant acc my mum to go out today..

mindblank....

my eyes are half close now & my table is filled with notes which i have brought back to study for the upcoming exam on fri.. despite the physical tiredness, my emotional one felt worse..... was told about the news this afternoon, it came really sudden.... though we had all prepared for the thing to come but when i was told about it, i still felt quite sian n upset......


i just cant bear to see ppl leaving.. i know i am just being too emotional cause in the workforce, this kinda situation is very common, esp in the financial sector.... but i just dun like this feeling la... argh~~~

i am feeling~~~

just what am i feeling now?? i just know that its not a happy feeling.. sad? tired?? lonely??? regret?? mayb its just a mixture of everything... i really duno how to describe it... i am getting more n more unsure of everything... i am feeling that i duno myself more n more....


btw, i wan to emphasise once again that this blog is a place for me to be myself n let my fren who is not always having a chance to meet up with me to know wat is happening to me... i really dun wish wat i post here to be a topic for ppl to discuss explicitly in places where they shouldnt even be mentioned in the first place.. i hope this blog will still be a private place for me & hope this decision & wish of mine will be respected... thx alot...

colleagues outing??

went out yest to meet my group member for our final project that is going to be due this coming fri... there are so many things up on our sleeves these days... the previous night, i spent more den 5 hours doing my individual reports on shipping sector.... after partially completing that, we still have another 3 more things to complete by the end of this week...


found out from declan that group 4 was in orchard too, so we sort of meet up with em n do our project.. why did i say we sort of meet up? well, its because we are at the same place but sitting quite a distance away doing our own stuffs.... finally have some idea of wat to do for the project.. after discussing & allocating the work, we went on to finish up our sales pitch thingy... ard 3 plus, we went to Food Republic to have our meal....


Went to Kino after that & quite a few of us decide to go n catch a movie.. i was supposed to meet Wayne for dinner & movie, so i asked him to join in for the movie thingy with my colleagues... We watched the Tropic Thunder as requested by Maurice... the show is really funny but at times it can be quite gross...


after the show, me & wayne went to have dinner @ the HK cafe.. finally get to eat my baked sphagetti, i have had a craving for that since last wk lo.. anna came to join us moments later.. we chatted & eat there until 12 b4 heading to balcony for a short chillout session until 1 plus...


i din go to bed immediately after coming back home.. decide to finish up the last part of my individual project b4 slping cause i dun wan to have alot of unfinished job on hands... just dun like the feeling of that...

revolving about work~~

reached home about 2 hours back.. was called up to attend a careet talk @ NTU @ the very last min... the reason why i was chosen is because i am the ONLY gal in the group... they asked us to go there is to let them have a feel of how the training is like & we are the best person they should ask cause we are going thru that right now...

the session ended ard 8 plus that explains why i am back so late.. back home still have to prepare for my presentation for tml.. realise that time is running out.. just know that in another 10days we will be presenting our final project to our big boss & we are not even a quarter way thru it... den there's still test n everything...... i need more den 24 hours!!

was browsing thru my previous entries & realise i seldom blog this days, if i do it will all be about my job.... i miss those days when i can just slack n blog about my feelings, my outings with frenz, familes etc....

its been less den a mth & i am missing my Dim Sum buffet session with my mum, my weekday window shopping with my frenz, movie & lunch session, mahjong almost every twice a wk..... i need a short getaway... can i have one to pamper myself after the final project is over??

out to relax..

had been going out for the past 2 nights with anna.. on fri, we went out for a chilling session @ one of the pub @ tanjong pagar, followed by a 2nd round @ live impact Shenton way with my colleague...


it was the 1st time so many of us went to chill out together.. the session was really cool but for me, i felt sth is just wrong.... partly is because of not having sufficient slp & partly also due to some stuffs happening at the work place which makes me doubt about my ability & capability.. its like i am starting to doubt myself if i am up to this job or not...


mayb i am just feeling paranoid, just like the time when i first started this job.. or mayb its due to the lack of slp that makes my mind run wild.. no matter wat, i just hope that this feeling will not come back to me again...


i went out with anna yest to have a short shopping session @ bugis.. after that we went to shaw house for dinner @ the thai eatery with benny.. the food there is pretty tasty... after dinner, we went to orchard to meet his frenz who were there celebrating his birthday.. we din stayed for long & decide to go back...


on our way to the station, we met my Uni mates... its been a long time since we met, so anna & i decide to hang out with em... in e end, we went back to the ktv where we previously came out from.. haha.. its a very fun & enjoyable session.. we sing until 2 plus b4 taking a cab back...

a busy week~~

it had been a tiring but fulfilling week for me.. preparing & doing all the presentations, learning all the things from operations, doing research, going to office b4 the sun comes up & only able to go back when the sky turn dark.... now i finally understand wat the team leader say.. if u do not have the passion for this job, its really hard for u to stay on.....


the news on the 1st person leaving our team came on wed... when i heard about it at the conference room, i was quite shocked by the news... its only the 5th day into our training & ppl is quiting... its amazing but fairly understandable.. this jobs really requires alot out from u.. after work, the time is not yours cause we still need to do research & prepare for the presentation the very next day...


everyone only can get max 6 hours of slp per day.. 6 hours sometimes is consider a luxury already.. for some i heard, they only slp for 2-3 hours a day.. now i understand why dealers like to drk & chill out... its really a very tiring job & after work, they should really reward themself & let themself relax...


personally, i thk drking really help.. on thur, we had a impromptu chilling session... went to drk @ a ktv pub near our workplace... we went to drk w/o eating anything & i got alittle tipsy after drking only 1.5 mug... the moment i reached home, i concuss all the way until the next morning.. but that was the most quality slp i had ever since i started work.... b4 that, every night b4 i slp, i will toss n turn ard half an hour on my bed thking about my working stuffs.. the dreams i had was also all those relating to the stock market & work..... its crazy right....


yest some of my colleague & i decide to go clubbing.. we had dinner near our workplace & went to a ktv pub again nearby cause it was still to early to head to a club.. Anna darling came to join us.. we head down to the Double O @ 11.. its been a long time since i went there on a Fri night.. normally i will go there on Wed Ladies night.. hehe..


we stayed there & dance until 2 plus b4 heading home cause this morning, we need to attend a seminar conducted by our trainers to the public... sth happened & i am expecting a scolding on mon... haiz..

tiring but exciting~~

2nd day into my new job & i am already feeling how dynamic this environment is.... it was a total unexpected first day at work for me.. i tot that it might just be like a normal first day with all the orientation thingy & should be quite slacked but guess wat?? i end at 730 with a project presentation the next day.....


i reach home about 9pm, forced myself to eat sth even though i am not hungry at all... ard 10, i went online to discuss about the project thingy with my colleague.. realised my Office has just expired which means i need to depend on others to do the slide for me... must really thx my colleague for helping me out & answering the stupid qns i have raised... i really like know nuts about all this thingy.. all those figures doesnt convey any msg to me at all, i just look at them like normal numbers.. those ratio, well, wat isit for???


today, i woke up at 530 cause i need to be in e office by 730am... b4 the job start, i tot that its ok for me to wake up late because i can still slp on the train.... well, its NOT true.... we were told tat we have to read up the BT b4 going to work to see wat is happening to the companies, stock market.... best is u can read up the Straits Times also for those things that are not being captured on BT but might have some direct or indirect effect due to that piece of news........


1st time i reached Shenton Way when the sky is still blue... its another hectic day filled with trg programs... we were discussing at Mac over lunch regarding our project... frankly speaking, i really ''catch no balls'' on wat is going on.... haha.. ORGANIC?? wat is that?? i only heard of it b4 in my BIOLOGY classes & know it is once a brand for a shampoo.. other den that, wat can it means?? sounds stupid rite, that's the way i am feeling right now.......


after lunch is our presentation.. i really duno how i fare lo.. if i were to rate myself, i will say its definitely a FAIL.. no eye contact with most of the ppl present, just trying to get over the thing ASAP, ( at sometime i wonder am i going too fast?? ), forgetting some of the points which i should have mentioned... if u are grading me, thk u will give me that kinda grade also.... damn disappointing.....


den it comes the mentor introducing session, thk i screwed up that session.... quite pissed with myself... argh~~ same as yest, we went back at 730.. i went to my grandma's place to run an errand for my mum b4 coming back home.... thk i am just too tired, i took the wrong direction train... should be taking the West one but i took e other one instead & its under the condition when i am not rushing into the train lo... i was reading the newspaper & only realised i took the wrong train when i reached Lavender.... another big ARGH~~~


met up with Anna, Meiyun & Chye @ Cwp... only managed to reach after 930.... we chatted until 12 plus b4 going back home.... i just love the gathering session with them... its so relaxing, so joyous.. haha...


ok, my hair is dried up now.. should head for my bed... officially out of bed for 21 hours.....

gonna be tied down~~

in another 2 more days, i will step into a new stage of my life.... NO MORE being a student & teenager, NO MORE slacking as & when i wan, NO MORE going to genting like how i used to in e past, NO MORE accompanying my mum to restaurant for Dim Sum Buffet, JB for shopping trips, watching HK drama @ home & alot of others '' NO- MORE''....


that's why over the past weeks, i am at home most of the time to acc my mum as much as i can b4 i start work.. once i start work, she will be like all alone at home most of the time cause my sibings will be schooling also... really cant bear to see her all alone at home facing the wall most of the time.. well u guys might say that when i am schooling in e past, i also leave her alone at home wat... yes i admit i did but working will take up more time den schooling...


if u asked me am i excited about my new stage of life now, i will say NO... i quite like wat i am doing now, spending all those quality time with my family though i am earning just enough to keep me going.. thk i am just too used to the lifestyle after my exams & this is making me becoming less goal-oriented & maybe too homely.... shall change my mentality & make myself more aggressive...


was watching the F1 race at home yest with my family.. its the 1st time i ever watch the full race... i was really fascinated with the skyline of Singapore & the performance of the drivers & the car.... the whole race was really exciting with all those events going on & the results was really unexpected.... i wonder are all the F1 race so exciting if yes den i will make it a pt to catch each & every one of them live.... if there is a chance, i will want to catch the race live @ the marina next yr, experiencing the power of the engine & the speed of the car...

back from genting~~

i am back from my genting trip.. as usual its a trip full of eating, standing & minimum slping... i went there on Sun & came back on Tue.. over the 3D2N period there, the place are PACKED even though they claimed that it is their low-peak season....




i took more den 3 meals a day when i was there.. breakfast, lunch, dinner, supper..... sometimes, there's tea break also.. haha.. though its not really misty, the weather is pretty cooling... had my latte & cheesecake on the 1st day.. :) wonder next time will i just go there specially for their latte & cheesecake.. haha...


some of the place there changed... well, things do change, dont they?? even things had changed, let alone humans... feelings arent the same anymore but at times i will still feel my heart aching over that issue... wat's tat aching feeling linked to?? well, i am not sure about it also..


gonna start work in another 2 weeks time.. feeling quite skeptical about it cause of the financial issue arising over the week.. thing seems really unstable.. hope after the trg period, the market will be alot better..