the 1st song from him & quite describe how i feel now.... well, mayb next time i will use songs to representwat i wan to write instead... btw the song is call 我不想忘记你...

was still feeling damn down n sian when i woke up tis morning.. i tot everything will be ok & i will be feeling fine aft an early rest but no... i took more den twice the time to walk from my place to e lib cause i wanna sort out my tots n wan to do it b4 i reach the lib cause i know if i dun, i wont be able to study there... in e end, i din manage to do tat... was sitting down there waiting for jean to come & staring into the notes... nth goes in at all.... feel damn xin ku...



my life is really damn drama.. sometimes i thk its too much for me... so much has happened within such a short time, b4 i can realise wats happening n switch to that mode, things changed again... things are changing too fast n i find it really hard to catch up wif it... at one pt, i find tat its so unfair cause he can know wats happening to me while i duno anything abt him... i dun like tis feeling.. its like a one-way traffic... i also dun wan to bother him too much cause i dun wan to annoy him....



he called in e end, am glad tat he did tat cause it makes me realise how silly n stupid i am... guess love will make someone stupid eventually.. no matter how hard i try not to revert back to my old silly self, i did it again... shit.. i was quite hostile at 1st... well, i dun mean it one... i really very pek cek abt why cant he tell me jux wat is wrong wif him & tell me how he feels.. isnt communication the best way out?? i wanna know wat i did exactly tat caused him to feel tat way so i know in e future, i will try not to do it....



i know tat entry the other day will sure haf some impact on him but i dun wish to lie abt anything or kp anything from him.. tat's y i blog.. contradiciting rite... yeah, it sure is... knowing tat wat i wrote will hurt someone n yet i did it.... really find trouble myself... serve me rite for feeling bad n pek cek... its my karma for hurting someone... now, i sure believe tat in life, there's really retribution.....



sort everything out aft that hr phone call... talk abt quite alot of stuffs... know wat he is exactly pek cek wif.... really glad tat he can tell me how he feel cause it really lift tat stone away... wanna thx him for being frank wif me during the conversation... i know it can be quite hard to say out ur inner feelings... :)



finally can sit down n conc... realise i start my revision for IM too early cause now, i cant rem a single thing.. trying hard to recap n find some familiar 'faces'... did find some but tis module is really too new & there's not much paper i can practise so i must study practically everything inside the SBG.... tat's so straining... only left wif another 3 more days to tat paper & mon i gt an interview in e afternoon... gonna waste like 2 hrs on it..... damn.... shouldnt be slacking tat past 3 days.... time is like running out....



well, no pt mourning over tat now... i'll make full use of watever i haf now to study everything n get everything rite.. tat's the spirit.... i wont let anything affect me for the next wk..... but den.... i am damn sleepy now... haha.. feel like slping now liao.....